Kids really do say the darndest things. Their points of view haven’t been shaped by culture or school, so their little minds are free to see life in a way adults haven’t really been able to in years.
These hilarious little geniuses used their brilliant minds to come up with new names for ordinary things, and honestly—they’re way better.
2yo referred to her coat pockets as "snack holes" and this is what I shall forever call them— Rebecca Caprara (@RebeccaCaprara) February 23, 2018
My kid just called Fruit Loops "Pride Cheerios" and I've never been happier in my life that this little dude calls me mom.— OutnumberedMother (@OutNumbMother) September 5, 2018
My 4-year-old called ice cubes "water bricks," and now I'll never call them anything else.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 26, 2018
My friend’s 5-year-old just saw a crow and called it a “Halloween eagle.”— Tessa Dare (@TessaDare) May 30, 2018
And a child shall lead us. It is known. This is the new name for the bird-formally-known-as-crow. You know what to do, @MerriamWebster.
My daughter doesn’t know the word “braces” so she calls them “tiny jails for your teeth.”— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) October 12, 2018
My daughter still calls sneezing "bless yous" and I will destroy anyone that ruins this for me.— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) March 1, 2017
5-Year-Old: HEY! WHERE ARE MY MATTRESS CURTAINS!?— Momarazzi. (@Mirimade) September 4, 2018
Me: Um... your sheets? I’m washing them.
I'm not saying that my daughter is overly dramatic.— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) March 29, 2016
I'm just reminding you that she calls tears "wet drops of sad."
my son just called a coffin a “skeleton burrito” and somehow I’m the one on twitter— Grant Tanaka (@GrantTanaka) February 7, 2019
My 2-year-old called the vehicle for sick people a "wee woo truck" and now I don't even remember what the right name is anymore.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 17, 2017
My 4 year old daughter calls penguins "cold owls"— ( ﾟдﾟ) (@jess2780) June 4, 2018
"I have cow-like reflexes."— Stella G. Maddox (@StellaGMaddox) October 31, 2013
My 9 year old either made an error in phrasing and meant to say cat or he is extremely self-aware.
A friend's 5 yr old saw a rhino and called it a "Battle Unicorn". Can we let 5 yr olds christen new species please?— Zoe's Zoo (@ZoesZooYouTube) May 30, 2018
My 4-year-old just called the garbage disposal switch a “gobble button” and that is what I will henceforth be calling it.— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) November 22, 2018
The boy I nanny used to call cactuses "poke trees," which is my most favorite thing. 🌵— Chris Dennis Myers (@d_cd_c) June 4, 2018
My two year old son calls beards/facial hair “face grass”. It started like a year ago and we can’t bring ourselves to correct him.— Janna (@janna_rpw) May 31, 2018
My daughter calls roots "tree veins" and honestly I think we should just allow her to name everything for us all from this point forward.— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) April 24, 2016
When my daughter was little she called her memory her remembery. It will always be that to us.— Isabel Jordan (@seastarbatita) May 30, 2018
Little kids may wake up too early but at least my five-year-old daughter calls the airport the airplane store.— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) September 7, 2014
When my daughter was a toddler she pointed to the back of her knee and told me she had a bug bite on her leg pit.😂 Then my son,(8 yrs younger), as a toddler learning how to scrub up asked "Do I scrub my leg pits too?" I think it's funny that they both called it the same thing.— Berean (@hotwirefences) May 30, 2018
My kid calls prune juice 'poop juice' (suitable) and wine or beer 'mama juice' (also suitable).— Lívia Labate (@livlab) May 31, 2018
For my daughter, elevators were "uppy rooms".— Teri Bloom (@tanderny) May 30, 2018
Watched Great Pumpkin special with my son yesterday and he LOST HIS F**KING MIND FOR SNOOPY.— Lin-Manuel Miranda (@Lin_Manuel) October 30, 2017
He calls him "SNOOFY."
NO ONE CORRECT HIM EVER
My 3-year-old calls bubble gum "gubble bum" and I say a little prayer every day that no one ever corrects her.— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) September 4, 2017
When my nephew was small he referred to pizza crusts as "pizza bones".— Army (@Skorpeo) May 30, 2018
My three year old decided escalators are called “robot stairs,” and so it has been decreed in our house.— Hunter Campbell (@HunterCampbell) May 31, 2018