Most people have let horniness take over common sense at some point in their lives, but the people who most regularly make a spectacle of themselves doing so online are bros. We just gotta face that. They haven’t been socialized to hide their thirst, so we see them panting everywhere.
This tweet from writer Kitty Wenham is an example of exactly how weird it can get online when men start typing in a lust haze. The Facebook group World Paintings regularly posts paintings…from around the world. Man’s favorite subject seems to be nude women engaged in various activities that show off their boobs, and this painting by William-Adolphe Bouguereau is a perfect example.
It’s a painting of a naked lady inspecting her foot, a piece of cloth draped artfully across her thigh. It’s a well-executed painting. It’s so good in fact that a bunch of guys seem to think she is a real woman?!
Wenham shared a screenshot of the strange interaction with the caption “men hitting on a painting.”
men hitting on a painting pic.twitter.com/QW9BUpeYP5— Kitty Wenham (@kittywenham) August 19, 2019
Here’s the model, who looks very real but is still obviously a painting:
And a slew of comments asking her to be a sexy friend to a bunch of dudes who seem to have trouble distinguishing reality from oil:
My real opinion is that these comments are created by some sort of bot or scam artist and they get posted to any public image that seems to be a human woman. It just doesn’t seem plausible that this many real human men would actually think this is a person, but it does seem realistic enough to fool an algorithm.
That doesn’t mean these dunks on thirsty dudes didn’t make me laugh:
Shit that’s a good point— ?Cassie? (@d20love) August 20, 2019
i think it was adriana Lima and IS SHE WRONG?— monti’s like ooh ah ☆ (@alarmoutline) August 20, 2019
Alternatively: "... you're 25 years old and I'm oil on canvas"— hero1897 (@pdxjaysavard) August 20, 2019
i think i will start saying this instead of “i love you 3000.” pic.twitter.com/kqvzqZeRUq— Amy B (@AMYB247) August 20, 2019
Omg I tried to read it as an “I love you 3000” thing too lmao... life post-Endgame ?— Christina Walker (@LadyStarstorm) August 21, 2019
Omg stop victim blaming a painting pic.twitter.com/GwbFYWLZcM— ?Charlie??????? (@Charlieydwi) August 21, 2019
I am from 2131, I approve this.— coconut pancake (@pelangi_oren) August 20, 2019
— Hurricane Fur Wizard (@EldritchQuibble) August 20, 2019
If we do go extinct, at least the computers will still have something to do: try to make love to each other in an endless FB comment thread.