I bullied myself out of severe social anxiety. It got to the point where being in a moderate to large group/crowd of people would give me terrible diarrhea. It got to the point where it was a hopeless spiral of fear of shitting myself in public (only ever happened once and no one noticed) and fear of crowds feeding into each other.
One day, I’d just had enough. Enough missing out on things and excluding myself from concerts. I think it was the night my sister and her husband brought me to see Les Mis when they were on tour, and I shat myself on the way to the bathroom.
So I started being my own bully. I told myself: “Ya know what, Atlas_Mech? You are going to do this, even if you shit yourself in the process. Don’t want that? Too fucking bad. Bring an extra pair of panties and pants. You’re nervous? Oh fucking well. You’re shaking and trembling and having a fucking panic attack 3 days in advance? Too fucking bad. You made a promise to be there, and you don’t ever fucking break a promise.”
And it wasn’t an instant success. I bailed early at parties and events, but people were glad I showed up. I told someone about my social anxiety and consequential diarrhea and they said, “that’s okay, it’s what I have a washer and dryer for! Oh! And now you can try on my clothes! I’ve got your back.”
The realization that I could change my reality.
I was unhappy with my weight so I started walking… Then running.. And then I was thin.
That simple cognitive realization tore down all of my self limiting barriers and enabled me to grab life by the balls.
Getting a dog. Funny thing is I didn’t even want to get one, I’m a cat guy and had a bad experience with a dog when I was younger. However my wife put up with my 2 cats for long enough so it wasn’t fair of me to refuse her when she wanted a dog, so here we are. Having something that both loves AND depends on me makes a huge difference – no offence to my wife or cats, but they’re pretty independent!
Get up and take a shower
Put on fresh and clean t shirt and pants
Do this everyday and don’t forget about it.
Video games. Not kidding.
During my one and only anxiety/panic attack my friend took me to a LAN party at someone’s house. There was a steep learning curve on whatever war strategy game we were playing but I didn’t care, it did the trick.
For me… Making good money and finishing my 3yr long job training. I was constantly stressed and not the outgoing type before, so of course that did not help. But once I finished my training and had some decent money to do things without counting what I spent, I was surprised how I said to myself “now you stop worrying all the time, and go have some fun”.
I’m still getting used to being around people, but I’m on a good track, I think.
You know how everyone says that to find a significant other, you must first learn to love yourself and be happy alone? When I was depressed, I felt so lonely. But someone started to like me. My confidence started to come back. Feeling loved felt like I was a real human being, worthy of love, and I started to believe it. It was the best thing that happened to me, a year later I didn’t feel depressed anymore. And after we broke up, for unrelated reasons, I still have the feeling that I’m not such a worthless person, someone did love me. I can do this.
Running. Run like Forrest Gump himself, a few miles a day and my nerves are calmed, self-worth improved.
Exercise, the keto diet, daily 10 minute mediations, and lsd. I was anxious my whole life and now it’s gone. I was depressed and passively suicidal for years and now that’s all gone too. It feels like enlightenment but I don’t know if a person should say they’re enlightened lol.
I learned from watching kids and dogs. Feel your emotions in the moment, then let them go and don’t worry about it so you can enjoy the simple things.