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Horrified Women Slam Viral List Of Rules On ‘How To Keep Your Husband’

A rule book detailing “30 Ways To Keep Your Husband” was recently posted to a wedding planning Facebook page, and the reaction to it was…what you might expect (outrage, shock, dropped jaws, etc.)

The list of “rules” includes “Never raise your voice for any reason to your husband. It’s a sign of disrespect,” and “Never ill treat your husband’s friends because you don’t like them.”

An anonymous member of that group posted screencaps of the rules alongside the caption, “Titled ’30 ways to keep your husband’ and shared in a wedding planning group.” She continued, in what I assume is shock and horror, “So many people were happily tagging their partners” before adding a vomiting emoji.

Titled “Every Woman Should Read These Godly Rules For Women” with the subscript, “Men: your future wife should read this,” the advice quickly garnered thousands of reactions and comments, few of them positive.

Some other guidelines: “Never blame your husband if he comes back home empty handed. Rather encourage him,” and “Never pretend to be sick for the purpose of denying your husband sex. You must give it to him how he wants it.”

Each rule includes the Bible verse from which it was presumably pulled.

Though difficult to see (the anonymous poster—presumably a woman—didn’t pull larger screencaps of rules past 10), you can make out the following:

15) “Never allow your friends to be too close to your husband” (ironically, no accompanying bible verse for this one)

16) “Never be in a hurry in the bathroom and on the dressing table. Out there your husband is always surrounded by women who took their time on their looks” (according to my very limited Google search of this verse, that is absolutely not what it says)

17) “Your parents or family or friends do not have the final say in your marriage. Don’t waste your time looking up to them for a final word, You must Leave if you want to Cleave (bizarro way of putting it, but perhaps the only decent piece of advice in this entire trash heap)

As well as:

21) Don’t be too judgmental to your husband. No man wants a Nagging wife (odd capitalization choice, as with the rest of these “rules.”)

22). A lazy wife is a careless wife. She doesn’t even know that her body needs a bath (???)

23) Does your husband like a kind of cooked food? Try to change your cooking. No man jokes with food (???)

24) Never be too demanding to your husband, enjoy every moment, resource as it comes (???)

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One woman wrote in the comments section: “Wow, look, another man giving advice that no one asked for.”

“How ridiculous and to think that out there some women and a lot of men think like this,” agreed another.

“How ridiculous!” added Raelena Tamez. “I’ve been happily married almost 15 years, I don’t follow any of these and we met in church. Someone really stupid wrote these and people are even stupider for following them.”

One genius then suggested, “We really need to write something like this for men so they’re less disappointing. Okay thanks.”

If there are any women reading this who actually believe in or abide by these arbitrary “rules” (and I don’t see how there can be, seeing as they probably don’t have Internet access), it’s not too late to GET OUT!